by 
[VCW logo glitches into static. The screen cuts to black and white. A single spotlight reveals Kurt Storm, standing behind a podium adorned with the symbol of “Right to Censor & Satisfy.” He slams his hands down, staring into the camera like a judge delivering a sentence.]
Kurt Storm:
“Once again… I find myself surrounded by the filth.
By the unworthy.
By the damn circus that dares call itself professional wrestling.”
“CatBob?”
You are the walking, talking definition of what’s wrong with this industry.
A disgrace. A pest. A CLOWN.
You have NO RIGHT to step foot inside the sacred circle we built with blood, honor, and discipline.
So now, my mission continues.
No, my crusade.
I will CENSOR—
I will BANISH—
And I will BURY every so-called ‘superstar’ who fails to meet the Standard of Excellence that VCW once stood for.
Kent Lassiter.
The fake prophet of cool.
Showtime.
More flash than fight.
And this “mystery man” you all whisper about in the shadows?
All three of you are at the TOP of my hit list.
You are parasites leeching off the legacy that men like ME built.
And at ELITE?
I’ll drag each one of you into the light and hold you accountable.
No more games.
No more passes.
No more room for mediocrity.
This isn’t about violence—
It’s about cleansing.
It’s about restoring ORDER to a world that’s lost its spine.
So hear me loud and clear:
THE RIGHT TO CENSOR—
AND SATISFY—
OHHHH TESTIFY!!!
[He slams the mic down. Sirens blare. The screen distorts and cuts to static.]
****************
🎪🎤 [Scene: The Hello CatBob Fun House – an explosion of colors, inflatable flamingos, smoke bubbles, spinning mirrors, and a suspiciously aggressive cotton candy machine in the corner.]
📺 Cue the CatBob Fun House Theme Song: a chorus of meows, kazoo solos, and dubstep beats.
[CAMERA ZOOMS IN on CATBOB sitting backwards on a tiny tricycle, wearing heart-shaped sunglasses and a robe made entirely of glittery scarves.]
CatBob:
🐱✨ “HELLOOOO EVERYBODY! It’s me, your favorite interdimensional hairball of mayhem—Cat! Bob!—comin’ at you LIVE from the Hello CatBob Fun House, where the rules are made up, the walls are squishy, and the pain? Oh honey, the pain is optional but encouraged!!”
[He honks a squeaky horn shaped like a mushroom.]
CatBob (dramatic):
“This week… we face the unfaceable. We take on Baine the Beefy, Kurt ‘Raincloud’ Storm, and Dennis Black, the man who smells like expired confidence!”
🎪 [The walls twist and turn like a funhouse mirror as a giant inflatable slide explodes glitter, and FERNINATOR somersaults in with a cape made of caution tape and pool noodles tied to her arms like wings.]
Ferninator:
🎤🌿 “That’s right, CatBob! We’re not scared! We’ve got vibes, snacks, and several gallons of unregulated slime. You think Baine’s scary? Try fighting someone who’s eaten 14 pixie sticks and believes in hugs AND headlocks!”
CatBob:
“Ferninator, tell ‘em what we’re bringing to the ring!”
Ferninator:
“CHAOS. CONFETTI. COMPANIONSHIP.”
CatBob (cackles):
“And my special move—THE WHISKER TWISTER.”
[Suddenly, the lights dim and thunder rumbles. A hidden door opens in the Fun House slide, and out steps RURIK, looking like he wrestled a tornado and won. He’s wearing a tiara and holding a rubber chicken.]
Rurik:
🛡️⚔️ “I have seen battle. I have seen darkness. But never… have I seen anything quite like this.”
CatBob (grinning):
“You like it? We call it “home.” Welcome, Rurik. You’re one of us now.”
Ferninator:
“Together, we’re the unstoppable trio of nonsense and nightmares! We’re gonna juggle the souls of our enemies and feed them cupcakes after!”
Rurik (holding up the chicken):
“For honor. For chaos. For fun.”
🎉 [Confetti cannons explode randomly. Somewhere, a goat screams.]
CatBob (leaning into camera):
“Baine, Storm, Dennis—you better pack a lunch and a therapist. Because when we roll into VCW, it’s not just a match… it’s a CARNIVAL OF CARNAGE with extra sprinkles.”
ALL TOGETHER:
“SEE YOU IN THE FUN HOUSE, LOSERS!!”
🎪 [Cut to black with a squeaky “MEOW” and kazoo fanfare.]
****************
Aliyah Bordy vs Alexia Cummings
As Alexia celebrates in the ring, the lights dim, and the camera cuts to the tron
[Camera fades in on a dimly lit room. Rosita stands alone, draped in the Pacific Women’s Championship, venom-black lighting flickering across her face like a storm brewing just beneath the skin.]
Rosita:
“Alexia Cummings…
You talk like you’ve already won. Like WrestleElite is your coronation.
But what you don’t realize… is that you’re not walking into a title match—
You’re stepping into an infection.
This championship? It’s more than gold.
It’s symbiotic. It breathes with me. Feeds off every soul I devour.
And Alexia…
At WrestleElite, I will inject a venom so potent, so consuming—
It won’t just stop your heart.
It will consume your soul.
You’ll feel it slithering through your veins.
Taking over.
Twisting everything you thought you knew about strength, about pain, about glory.
You don’t take this title from me, Alexia.
You become a part of it.
Just another voice screaming in the dark behind my eyes.
You wanted a shot at the queen?
Welcome to the reign of the Venom Queen.
And understand this—
You will NEVER take the Pacific Women’s Championship away from me.
I don’t lose.
I infect.”
[Rosita stares dead into the camera as the screen flickers, the sound of a heartbeat echoing before fading to black.]
